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Brian Beasley is the Legal Adviser for the High Point Police Department in High Point, North Carolina. In order to justify his exorbitant (not really) salary and keep his officers informed of the latest changes in the law, he writes legal updates from time to time. Brian knows that officers aren’t generally enthusiastic about reading something entitled “Legal Update” so he tries to include some humorous footnotes to encourage them. Since he began writing these updates, officers from other agencies have asked to be added to the mailing list, but Brian decided that creating a blog was by far a more arrogant and geeky option.

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    Snakes In A Box: Guess What You Signed Up For

    23 Oct

    Posted by Brian Beasley In Legal Update

    To download a PDF file of this update, click here

    Snakes In A Box: Guess What You Signed Up For
    Legal Question of The Week

    Vol. 2, Number 23
    October 23, 2009 

    Brian Beasley
    More Scared of Spiders Than Snakes and Legal Adviser, HPPD

                Breaking news from the AP wire!  Dateline:1  Duluth, Minnesota.

    A Minnesota man has pleaded guilty to driving his motorized La-Z-Boy chair while drunk. A criminal complaint said 62-year-old Dennis LeRoy[2. Interesting that the “r” is capitalized in Mr. Anderson’s middle name.  Does this mean the emphasis goes on the second syllable?  I think if you are driving a motorized La-Z-Boy down the street and into your favorite bar, your middle name has to be pronounced LEE-roy instead of la-ROY.] Anderson told police he left a bar in the northern Minnesota town of Proctor on his chair after drinking eight or nine beers.2 Prosecutors say Anderson’s blood alcohol content was 0.29, more than three times the legal limit, when he crashed into a parked vehicle in August 2008. He was not seriously injured.3 Police said the chair was powered by a converted lawnmower and had a stereo and cup holders.4

    Sixth Judicial District Judge Heather Sweetland stayed 180 days of jail time Monday and ordered two years of probation for Anderson. His attorney, David Keegan, did not immediately return a call for comment.

                For some reason this story did not get the media coverage given to the “Balloon Boy Saga,” so I wanted to make sure that you were aware of it.  Since that’s out of the way, let’s get down to some serious legal business. Read More

    1. Isn’t it odd that the term “dateline” is used for where the story is reported from instead of when?  It used to refer to both when and where, but now the date is usually omitted from wire reports. ↩
    2. I wonder if the drinkers of Proctor, MN thought this guy was crazy or thought he was the coolest guy ever as he drove his recliner into the bar.  I’m guessing the latter and I’ll also speculate that this guy never had to pay for a beer.  I mean – he drove his chair into the bar! ↩
    3. Of course he wasn’t seriously injured – he was in a padded recliner!  Who needs airbags when you are in a soft padded chair? ↩
    4. Before you get any ideas, you could also be charged with DWI in North Carolina if you drive a lawnmower down the street while subject to an impairing substance, whether or not you have converted it into a La-Z-Boy. ↩
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    “Captain Savage” and 2009 Probation Reform

    09 Oct

    Posted by Brian Beasley In Legal Update

    To download a PDF file of this update, click here

    “Captain Savage” and 2009 Probation Reform
    Legal Question of The Week

    Vol. 2, Number 22
    October 9, 2009 

    Brian Beasley
    Former Probationary Employee and Legal Adviser, HPPD

                In 1841, a Boston boot maker born in Woburn,1 Massachusetts persuaded a judge in the Boston police court to give him custody of a convicted drunkard2 for a brief period prior to the man’s sentencing.  The boot maker’s name was John Augustus3 and he was concerned about the practice of sentencing criminals without regard to their particular background.  The judge released the man to Augustus’ custody on condition that the man pay a fine of $3.76 and return to court in three weeks. Read More

    1. With the opening of the Middlesex canal in 1803, Woburn had increased access to tanbark, and as a result the tanning, shoemaking, and (one could surmise) boot making businesses thrived.  Pay attention – this is all going to be on the test later. ↩
    2. We don’t convict people anymore of the status crime of being a “drunkard” and it’s rare to even hear the term “drunkard.”  I think both of these changes are regrettable.  In fact, the man in question was convicted not only of being a drunkard but of being a “common drunkard.”  There wasn’t even anything special about him.  So sad. ↩
    3. Augustus was a member of the Washington Total Abstinence Society which promoted total abstinence from alcohol (not sex – that would be too cruel).  This society, while short-lived, laid the groundwork for later “Alcoholics Anonymous” programs. ↩
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